So, that was Christmas.
It's New Year's Day!! A new year of optimism, hope, joy and fun lie ahead of us.... At least, I hope so. I'm not a natural lover of New Year. I tend to enjoy the family madness of Christmas and then try to ignore the wild celebrations of the future. Perhaps I see the Future too much as like one of Dicken's phantoms; a black hooded faceless fear-filling creature of the unknown. Certainly I am too inclined to fear the future rather than grab it and kiss it at this particular time of year. It's as if the love and comfort of a Christmas is followed so closely by a sudden change. You really liked 2014? Well, tough, because that's gone and will never be back. All you have are the photos you grabbed between stuffing the turkey and spilling the red wine. And being employed as a rolling contract is probably not helping me feel more secure this year. I'm sure I'm employed until Easter. 3 months of security. It will do for the moment. It has to.
But I am a natural optimist. By February I will be ready to surface with happy optimism, with plans for the year and smiles all round. Perhaps I have Seasonal Affective Disorder. Perhaps I should re allocate my New Year celebrations to the end of February and start the planning then, when sunlight shines on the start and end of my days and I can see the new cycle of life flowing.
And I have to accept that this is natural for me. This is how I function. But I don't need to just roll over and say die. This year I am trying to bring the happier, future loving self into my life earlier. I have bought Leonie Dawson's Amazing Life + Biz planner.
It's a guided planning process, helping people to set goals, to think about what they want to achieve personally and professionally. And, yes, I know a piece of paper and decent pens could achieve the same, but for this year, which for me will be a crucial turning point in my life, I felt the need for a more structured approach. I've been filling it in slowly over the break, when I get a few spare minutes and can think what I want. I have pages to fill in, and lots of possibilities to consider, including moving over full time into Peter Kneale Solicitor as secretary, PA, IT and paralegal. This could be the last year I spend working in school. After 40 years thinking of myself as a teacher in a school, that's a scary thought. But a good one. This is going to be a year of re-creation (the hyphen is important there). It won't be easy, breaking away from a long past isn't easy, but it will be exciting. And exciting is good, isn't it?